29 July 2012

The LOS in my head


I should be honest with you. I am sick. I am terribly sick in my head. All my life I felt restless, extremely happy or extremely sad, energetic, alive or miserably dead, in love or sick of everything around me. After years of tests, scans and talking endless hours with the best shrinks I could find, I was diagnoses with the Little Ones Syndrome, the LOS.

I will try to explain in plain words what the LOS means. First of all, it's something you are born with and something that cannot be cured, only managed. The next information may come as shocking to some: all humans are born with Pixies in their heads. I call them Pixies but they are just little creatures, looking like people so I guess Pixies is the best way to describe them. They control the mind and tell you what to do and how to feel. You can sometimes try not to listen to them but it depends on the Pixie and on your willpower. I, for example am a very weak little thing and Pixies can very easily take advantage of me. But that's not the LOS yet. The LOS is when things go wrong, instead of one Pixie, you get more Pixies, which leads to total chaos.

When I was born I became the unfortunate hostess of four pixies. These four Pixies have different opinions and ideas. Most of the time they disagree with each other. Can you understand the torment I have been going through? Now, let me tell you something about the Pixies in my head.

First of all there is Lola, yes like the Copacabana song. She is full of life, energy, she wants to dance, sing, meet new people and have as much fun as she can. Love is temporary, pleasure is an every day necessity and responsibility is a word unfamiliar to her. She wants to enjoy life and do as much as she can. She knows she can only live once. Why bother with things that she doesn’t want to do or places where she doesn't want to be in? She loves the sun, the beach, money, party all night long and she is crazy about cocktails and beautiful flirty men.

Second, we have Iulia. Iulia believes in eternal love, one soul mate only exists for her. She believes you shouldn't fool around with other men but love one man, only one who is worthy of her love. She believes in a steady job, a job in which she can help others and a balanced life. She loves to be home and take care of the ones that really matter to her. She believes that life is supposed to be shared and not kept selfish to one's own purposes. She loves her family and would love a home in the mountains with a forest at her side and beautiful nature to welcome her every morning.

Then there is Nhor. Nhor is a manly man and he is aware of the dangers that life beholds. Yet he knows he is strong enough and beautiful enough to survive it all. He is a mobster, a philosopher, a Casanova and a barbarian. Death is something he does not fear and physical pain is on every day basis. He hates women who expose their emotions all too often and people who are dumb and weak. Nhor travels from one place to another, gains as quickly as he loosed his money and does not need a steady home.

The last one is Derrios. He lives alone hidden in a dark castle. His face is scared and he does not show it to anybody. His life is miserable and he believes in no kindness or love. He believes humanity has come to its end and only death can relieve him from the torment he has to face every day. He does nothing, feels nothing but pain, sorrow and regret.

So you see Lola often fights with Iulia, Nhor hates Derrios and then there are the fights between Lola and Derrios, Iulia and Nhor.

Why have I explained this to you? In case, one day, you start thinking that I might have multiple personalities, please remember, that is not true, I suffer from the LOS.

Anyone else who suffers from the same disease?